This is the final post in my “mini-series” about the Northen family blogs. I
want to sample the remaining four blogs, those that were not mentioned in the
last post. Maura Northen Augelli describes some of the comments to avoid making
when talking to friends with mood disorders. . Maura Madden Northen looks at how
women are often reluctant to seek financial planners. Michael Northen describes
a colonial ancestor who was sued by his wife for divorce. Maya Augelli Northen
describes yoga as physical surrender.
Maya Northen Augelli – from Lilies and Elephants
“The Most Frustrating Things People Say To Someone With a Mood Disorder”
It's no secret that there's a huge stigma surrounding mental health. I've
blogged before about the myths of mood cycling conditions, and even some of the
positives I've gleaned from mine, but I thought I'd address some of the other
statements and negativity we get dealt with on a regular basis, just for being
ourselves
- "You're way too emotional.
"I've actually been admonished for
"being a baby" for tears that people didn't understand. Yes, I'm probably more
emotional than a lot of people. But I'm not a baby. I'm not weak. I'm not
spoiled. I have a big heart. I feel things greatly, deeply. It means if you were
in trouble, I'd feel it so greatly I'd move mountains to help you. It means I
also feel joy and excitement greatly too. Is that such a bad thing?
- "You're unrealistic/delusional."
Mood cyclers have expansive brains. They stretch to
extremes. They're often incredibly creative, imaginative, visionary. Did you
know that Beethoven, Van Gogh, and Picasso are all said to have had (or were
actually diagnosed with) Bipolar Disorder? Just because our dreams and brains
stretch a bit further into areas some can't understand, just because our paths
aren't always the same as yours, doesn't make us unrealistic or delusional. It
may well mean we reach heights or discover paths others don't think to go.
(Continue reading about negative statements people with mood disorders deal with
at
http://liliesandelephants.blogspot.com/2013/12/the-most-frustrating-things-people-say.html)
**
Maura Northen Madden – from Women + Money = Power
“Traditional Financial Planning Has Overlooked Women”
Within the traditional sphere of personal finance, which has its foundation in
patriarchy, women are often ignored. When women are acknowledged it is as a
target market. In industry publications you will see plenty of articles stating
that more money is moving into the hands of women, followed by instructing on
how advisors and planners can appeal to these female potential clients. There is
frequent conversation on the financial planning topics viewed as “female”:
Longer life expediencies, challenges of being a caregiver, the wage gap. It is
necessary to recognize the differing financial needs of women. Unfortunately,
that is usually where the conversation ends. Rarely is there any discussion of
how to best provide service to women. Rather, the focus seems to be on how to
manipulate women into behaving like men. (Sound familiar? I’m guessing that more
than a few readers have experienced this in employment, education, consumerism,
and many other areas of life.) I believe that this is where feminist financial
planning can step in and actually address the needs of women through
communication methods, relationship building, and topics of discussion.
((To see what feminist financial planning has to offer see https://mauramadden.com/feminist-financial-planning/)
**
Michael Northen – from Northen History
“William Northen”
In doing research on the Northen family, most of the material that I run across
are lists of names and dates, but
occasionally something colorful comes along that shows what some of our
ancestors were really like. That is the case with William Northen and his wife
Abigail Minty. William was born in 1719. He and Abigail were married sometime
between 1738 and 1742 and lived in Richmond County, Virginia. He was active in
politics, voting for members of the Virginia’s House of Burgesses. He was also
occasionally summoned to court, though much less so than his father. In 1753 he
was made surveyor of the road from Clark’s Run to Totusky Bridge and Red Mill.
This was just at the time when a younger George Washington was finishing up his
stint as a surveyor, so it was a job that was accorded some respect. He also
seems to have been acquiring property in addition to what he inherited from his
mother and his wife’s family because on October 20, 1766 he is granted “a
Certain tract of waist and ungranted land” in Richmond County. The will of
another resident of Richmond County also gave William and his heirs unlimited
fishing rights on his property. Then, In 1775 (one year before the Declaration
of Independence), Abigail sued her husband. What happened? Apparently William
posted a note on the courthouse door saying that he was selling four or five
hundred acres of land long with all of his cattle, household goods and eleven
slaves. Abigail went to court to stop him. Why would she want to do that? Well,
they had seventeen children and he had not supported them in any material way
for the past two years. Abigail claims he had not even given her linen to make
clothes for the kids.
(To read about how the situation turns out for William,
Abigail and their descendents continue at
https://northenhistory.wordpress.com/2013/10/04/william-northen/)
**
Maya Northen Augelli – from Maya Augelli Blog
“Surrendering Into What Serves Me Best”
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of surrender. Not surrender in
terms of giving up but more in terms of an allowing, a letting go of some of the
things we hold onto so tightly that it holds us back, a sinking into what serves
us instead of resisting it. Last week I taught a Yin/Vin Pop-Up class, and I
felt this surrender in a physical way. In Yin Yoga, we hold poses for
significantly longer - usually somewhere between one to five minutes. When
you’re holding a pose, say a hip opener like Pigeon/Sleeping Swan or Frog, the
body’s natural tendency, or at least mine, is tense up so that you don’t sink
into anything that feels uncomfortable. Sometimes, we even do this without
realizing we’re doing so. But when you do this, you’re just holding tension in
your body, which ultimately doesn’t feel better and often takes more energy and
effort than just letting yourself surrender into the pose. If you do allow
yourself to release the tension and to sink in naturally (surrender of this
nature is not forced), you’ll find that once you get past the initial moments of
discomfort, it actually begins to feel better. Additionally, in this practice we
used props when needed/desired, which allowed us to sink in while still being
supported. It wasn’t a “free for all” of forcing ourselves past what made sense
in our bodies in that moment. We simply sank in, surrendered into the props or
the mat or our bodies instead of actively resisting, which may sound easy
enough, but can feel quite difficult in practice. (Caveat - of course if you
have an injury or other reason to not go into a pose or variation, definitely
listen to your body!).
(Much more can be read about yoga can be at
https://maya-augelli.com/blog/2020/9/25/surrendering-into-what-serves-me-best)
In to the blogs excerpted above, the blog that are reading now Northen News has
many stories, poems or anecdotes from and about family members. Just click on
the links to the side to explore them.
