Ed emailed me today to tell me that one of my few remaining aunts,
Sr. Karen, died on Friday. I suppose that every family has that relative that
they would rather not have show up at their front door. In our family, it was
Sr. Karen – but she showed up anyway.
She is also one of my top candidates for the person least likely to be a
nun – but, again, she was. If the
capacity to put on blinders to the feelings of others and plow ahead with what
you want can be considered a virtue, then that virtue was Sr. Karen’s.
I think we all have our stories about Sr. Karen that
illustrate what has caused us to form our particular opinions. I’ll just offer two brief ones and hope
others will add their own. The first was
when my son Pat, was an infant. We were
in my parents’ living room and my wife Mary was nursing Pat. Sr. Karen walked into the room, grabbed Pat
and started pulling him away from her in mid-nurse. The second instance happened when Lora and I
were visiting in California, I think for Mom and Dad’s Golden Anniversary. It was getting late in the evening, the sky
was dark and everyone was tired. We were
sitting in the living room and Sr. Karen was there as well. People kept hinting that they were tired and
wanted to go to bed, but Sr, Karen did not take the hint. One by one, people got up and headed back to
bed. Finally, only Lora and I were left and finally, we said we were going to
bed. We walked down the hall and turned out the lights. But Sr. Karen still
didn’t leave. She just sat there until she felt like going. The ultimate indictment for me is that on one
occasion Dad, who had the patience of Job and was rarely roused to anger,
actually kicked her out of the house.
I’m sure that other family members have happier memories of
her. I have the sense that she and my
sister Mary were close at one time and that she helped Mary out. She would also send out a family newsletter
every Christmas before blogs and email
came into vogue and update everyone on her year and her various travels. Though it was mostly about her, it was a way
of trying to keep the family connected. I
suspect that Sr. Karen saw herself as a caring person and that by gracing
people with her visits she was doing them a favor.
Ed says that, despite her flaws, she had potential, and
perhaps he is right. She went into the
convent at fourteen years old and while still young was sent to the Solomon
Islands (near New Guinea) to work in the missions there for a period of ten
years. I suspect some kind of cultures
shock occurred – this wasn’t a time in history when farm girls went off to
exotic islands. Even Mom, who gave Sr,
Karen no ground for anything said that when she returned, she was never the same
person.
Mom and Sr. Karen were
like oil and water. Their relationship
would have made for a TV situation comedy.
Whenever I called Mom during the last few years of her life, I could
always expect to hear about the tribulations she had suffered at the hands of
Sr. Karen. At that point in their
relationship, Sr. Karen could have been St. Karen and she still would not have
had a chance. Even so, she was Mom’s sister and the original left. In fact, if she is still alive, my Aunt
Geneice in Texas may be the only one.
As I was updating my information about Sr. Karen on the
family tree, I also discovered that my Aunt Beryl had died in January of this
year. Beryl was Mom’s next youngest sister and the polar
opposite of Sr. Karen. She was the one
Mom was closest too and had a tremendous amount
of character. Her life, though,
is a whole different saga.
3 comments:
In addition to the story of her sitting there as everyone went to bed - which I had forgotten but remembered upon reading it - my only two real memories of Sr. Karen include the following, and they are mildly amusing, though not because of her, but at her expense. The first one is when someone brought "special" brownies to a family gathering, and (none of us knowing what they were then, particularly us kids) we realized Sr. Karen had been eating a bunch of them. Looking back, that makes for a pretty good laugh. I don't remember the her the rest of the gathering, but perhaps she was more fun! The other is when she drove a car through the front of a building. She was ok, I believe, but the thought of someone who always seemed to think she was above people doing something so obviously embarrassing was a bit amusing, once we knew she was ok.
Maya, thanks for these incidents. I'd forgotten about the brownies and the fact that it was Sr. Karen is what made it so funny! I'll bet she never lived that down at the convent.
I also want to add a coda to yesterday's post. In searching out Mom's remaining sister, Geneice, I found out that she died in 2013 in Young, Texas, which means that all of Mom's sisters are deceased and only Uncle Armond is still living. Another factoid: Geneice's obituary lists her first name as Margaret - something I never knew.
Maya is right about the accident. Interestingly, the store she crashed into was a Stater Bros market on Collins in Orange. My Engine Company crew went on the emergency and one person had to go to the hospital. I happen to be in Idaho and when I returned my crew told me about the call and and that the driver was a nun I told them she was my Aunt. Mom had already told me about it and had a picture from the newspaper to prove it. Sister Karen told mom that the accident was her fault because mom did not have any diet soda in the refrigerator on regular. Sister Karen wanted a soda but since she had diabetes she could only drink diet soda so she went to the store. In other words Sister Karen said it was moms fault because she did not have diet soda in the refrigerator. Try to reason with that line of thinking.
Mike thanks for the info on Aunt Beryl and Geneice. I was pretty certain both had passed but had had not heard anything for certain. I think uncle Bob might still be alive, last I heard he might have moved from Billings MT to the Seattle area. But I do not know if that happened or not.
When I think of mom's family I realize in a few more years all the people from their generation will have passed. Strange to think about it.
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